Getting crafty for your fixie on Etsy

My wife is an art and craft junky. When I’m out for the night my wife can comfortably while away the night on Etsy looking at and buying craft. She keeps the courier busy for weeks after as he beats a path to our door several times a week with yet more packages. I’ve never had time for this, having no place in my life for such trivial stuff and  useless junk. Well…that was until I found out there was useless fixie junk on Etsy.

William Burroughs claimed that a good junk habit took months to cultivate. In comparison Etsy is more like crack cocaine. It starts simple enough, maybe a fixie t-shirt:

How’s anyone to know you’re hard core if you’re not riding? Get the t-shirt.

And then a couple little badges:

My wife has her own brooch-back mountain for preparing her own brooches.

Then you start getting serious and pretty soon you’re drinking fixie:

Yes, despite the gears the mug is “bicycle coffee mug for the fixie hipster” Must be one of those fixies with gears…

Then you’re putting fixie prints on your wall:

I quite like this one.

If you’re developing a proper habit by now you’re moving into the hard gear, like a leather frame bag:

The sophisticated way to carry tools and a cut lunch on your fixie.

And a Brooks saddle that’s been fancied up with a bit of eyelet work:

Getting folksy.

And OD’ing on wooden fenders:

Getting wood for fenders.

You’re probably already hanging your bike in your lounge room like it’s Mona in the Louvre and Etsy has plenty of options to help you hang it right: