Gold Coast: The Musical

Okay, this might be a single speed blog but it’s also a Gold Coast blog so for my international and interstate readers I thought I should explain something about the GC.Well it’s this long strip of coastal…no wait, too boring. Let’s do it in song instead.

I’ll start with Queensland. If you’ve never been to Queensland then this song, Queensland by Evil Eddie, tells you everything you’ll ever need to know about it.

Now that you’ve had a broad education it’s time to give you some knowledge more specific to where I live.  In order to fully inform your knowledge about the Gold Coast it’s important to fill you in on some of the nearby towns. The OK Cowboys tune is self-explanatory, it’s about this stinking hole to the west of us known as Beaudesert. I loosely translated Beaudesert as ” town with no men”, Beau meaning man and desert meaning, well, desert. It’s not true though. I’ve seen plenty blokes in Beaudesert. Maybe it’s a typo and it’s actually Beaudessert, town of masculine desserts. Anyway, queue the song.

Alright, now this following song might reveal as much about myself as it does about the Gold Coast. Suffice to say this was a song from my youth. It has barely a glancing reference to Gold Coast but it’s an important one. For years the Gold Coast has been seen as the party town of choice for all sorts of big city criminals (sometimes working holidays), misfits and wannabes. If you ever want to see the boys light up, come witness the annual bacchanalia known as…whatever, everyone still calls it Indy. GC is also the second home for half of New Zealand.

Next are the Winnie Coopers, local Gold Coast hip hop outfit. What this song tells you is how stupid it is to transcribe southern fashions into our sub-tropical coastal town. Once you’ve seen goths walking the beaches in full black and make-up you think you’ve seen it all. Thankfully goths are gone but that doesn’t stop the local hip hop boys from wearing their hoodies in 90% humidity. I’ve only ever seen the Winnie Coopers live and I’ve very pleased to discover they have such a wonderfully awful video. It walks an uncomfortable line between bad parody and, you know, just plain bad.

You’re almost done and you know almost everything you need to know about the Gold Coast at this point. One final song just to finish you up. It’s the theme song for the local AFL team, the Suns. It’s the song that gets played at the end of the game after a win. All you need to know about this song is that it never gets played.

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