Gravity sceptic speaks out

When you only have one gear gravity can be an inconvenient truth. Flying along the flat on a fixie we’re equal with our geared cousins. Get to a steep pinch and we’re at a distinct disadvantage. Or we would be if gravity existed.

(Fixie dudes walking their bikes because they’ve been conned into believing the gravity lie.)

Gravity is no more than a theory designed to explain a set of observations about certain behaviours. If you look at certain behaviours in isolation, Newton’s falling apple for example, then the theory seems sound. The problem is the theory is only maintained with a wilful ignorance of contrary observations. Even scientists will admit that gravity is merely a theory and it would take only one apple that fell upwards to put the lie to the millions of apples that fell down.

Read on for, as I will explain, things fall up all the time.

Some call me a gravity denier but I’d prefer to call myself a gravity sceptic because I have a lot of science and observation to back my beliefs. For instance, hot air balloons. Some so called experts will tell you that balloons fall up because hot air is lighter than cold air. That may be so but if gravity actually existed then air, whether hot or cold, would still be heavier than gravity and it would fall.

What about aeroplanes? What makes them go up? Again, so called experts have an explanation, pitiful though it is. They say that the curvature of the wings makes the air on top travel faster than the air below, creating a higher pressure below the wing, forcing the aeroplane upwards. Is that so Mr Expert? Then explain to me how a plane flies upside-down?

Even children can make and observe soap bubble and yet intelligent erudite and well paid scientist choose not to see the soap bubble floating on air.

Of course,  I’m not stupid. I will admit that there is some falling going on. I just don’t believe that this falling is as fast as generally reported or that the rate of falling is accelerating.

I wouldn’t be so outspoken about this lie called gravity if so many people weren’t getting hurt by it. Observe:

Not an isolated case. Here’s more:

If only people would stop perpetuating this myth about gravity then people like him wouldn’t have to get hurt. (Though nothing could save him from that hair cut.)

What’s more, expenditure on gravity amounts to nothing less than a gravity tax. When we build bridges and buildings we design them to withstand this gravity, which adds an extra cost to already expensive infrastructure. With government taxes levied on over-all cost of such projects it’s easy to see how the government benefits by perpetuating the gravity myth.  With families already sick of the high price of milk and, you know, other stuff like the family’s fifth television for little Aayden’s personal media room…well the gravity tax is the kind of impost that is dragging our society down. Some families are so strained they could hardly afford their annual holiday in a third world beach resort like Bali of Fiji if it wasn’t for incredibly cheap air fairs (or the fact that we are so unreasonably wealthy compared with them).

What our country needs is a politician with the guts to stand up against gravity and defy it in the face of nearly overwhelming support from almost every person of knowledge, intellect and reason. Like this guy does with global warming:

(Tony Abbott laughs at climate change science.)

Of course, I don’t necessarily want to be lumped in with climate deniers. There is a vast difference between my brand of scepticism and his type of denial. With near universal scientific consensus on an issue like climate change you come off looking like a buffoon if you try and maintain an attitude of scepticism with no-one but some fellow crack-pots with Swiss cheese science behind you. I am, on the other hand,  a sceptic, because I have proof. My balloons fall up and my aeroplanes fly. What’s more, if I’m wrong I don’t condemn future generations by handing on a fucked up planet.